“Creativity is intelligence having fun.” – Albert Einstien
That writing is a choice and can be done with intention. I always thought I writing was a random inspiration for me. When it came, it came and most poems I had ever written were a set of words forcing their way through me and out on to paper. It felt like a need, a therapy of sorts reflecting my inner turmoil and allowing a needed release or reflection. I even wrote a poem about this, see Inspiration. So, when I transitioned to an intention of 30 poems in 30 days I figured worse case I could tap in to my repository of old poems to fill the gaps.
What I discovered is as the month went on the words flowed easier and I could find daily inspiration just by intentionally trying to do so. From simply being inspired by the flicker of a candle flame or contemplating the teachings of Buddha or the Tao te Ching, I was able to pull a song of words that flowed in the same way as the prior emotional releases provided.
That there is no need to fear your own voice. I have always loved writing since I was a child. When I was young I was recklessly creative, winning awards for various stories and loving to read books as much as I wanted to write my own. It wasn’t until high school when I learned the typical essay structure of writing to get the good grades that my creativity began to diminish. That along with being over a year younger than my classmates and having plenty of insecurities to go with it made me less open to expressing my true self and art. I even leaned more toward left brain subjects of math and science, and away from English and history and other courses that required a lot of writing.
It took me until midlife and the obligatory crisis to get to a place of wanting to find my truth and my voice. I have always journaled. Then as I developed a meditation practice, I found a lot of inspiration and curiosity about power of living a more intentional life along with the realizations of how far I was from doing this. I also realized that this had shaped almost all my challenging experiences. Suddenly I understood the power or gratitude, compassion, self-care, and choosing love in every interaction with others. The power of forgiving myself and others and realizing that I have as much to offer the world as everyone else and the only person keeping me from doing so was myself.
So, I started a blog. I did this just to house my writing and inspiration and hone my practice more “intentionally” along with other areas of my life. When National Poetry Month showed up, it was a spur of the moment decision to participate since I had a venue to do so. I didn’t start a blog for approval, just to write and if something I write ends up hitting a cord with someone else, I am honored. If not that’s ok too. It’s not that serious. So I no longer fear putting up a window for those to see me through my writing. Likely what they think they see is only a projection of themselves and their interpretations anyways.
That it all comes down to priorities. I am a working mother of twin daughters. I have a job managing a 10-state geography managing 13 people and am on a plane almost every week. I am loyal to my meditation and yoga practice and I love to cook from scratch. I run a monthly women’s group that requires a good amount of planning for content and organization. So throwing in a commitment to a poem a day was another “to-do” on my list. I had my days where it was 10pm and I was scrambling to publish and even a couple days where it didn’t happen until the morning after due to working a 16-hour day. I could easily have given up. There was no accountability, only intention and a personal commitment to myself. So I made it a priority. Simple as that. I don’t watch TV. I put off returning a call. I planned the time in my day I could work on it. I simply became aware of the world around me in search of inspiration. Almost all the poems here were written in less than half an hour with only a couple started then finished at different time.
That writing is a passion to be pursued with willful intent. This may seem like a given, though my historically type A personality has tried to pull me back to the idea that creativity is not practical. I am learning to tune out that voice and realize that my creativity is bringing me insight, awareness and connection to things and people that inspire me even more in this life. I got the courage to submit to Bella Grace magazine last fall and was published in the Spring issue. I did not expect that outcome and it was so exciting. If I had worried about rejection or defined success as only getting published or paid, I am confident that would not have happened. It was the courage to submit something in to the universe for critique that was the win for me. So, I will continue to let go of fear and create. I am detached from the outcome while in my heart knowing it will guide my path and enhance my life.
“Your own reasons to create art are reasons enough. Do whatever creates a revolution in your heart.” -Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic